Patrick and I made it into a Saturday Night Live show last night. We got tickets to a rehearsal show--there's a rehearsal performance before every show--Patrick and I barely got in--we were the last two people who made it. We got up Saturday morning to stand in line at 6 a.m. to get stand by tickets that might or might not get us in. The weather is probably the only reason we got in--it was about 28 degrees Saturday morning, and to a lot of NY people, that's arctic cold, so the lines weren't as long as usual. They won't let you wait inside for tickets at Rockefeller Center any more because a few years ago, some people waiting in line vandalizing the building, and it is an incredible building--it's Art Deco--I know nothing about architecture, but it's so beautiful you can't not be amazed by it--that is one of the things that really knocks me out about Manhattan--there are just so many incredible buildings--it is hard to fathom the tons and tons of marble, gold, silver, and expensive stone, etc., that are on this relatively small patch of land.

The SNL studio itself is TINY--it all looks so big on TV, but the entire thing, including the balcony seating, is maybe half the size of the stage alone at Table Rock, if that. I have never been so close to famous people before--Alec Baldwin and Robert Downey Jr. were in the audience, and of course the cast and guests--I could have spit on Lorne Michaels if I'd wanted to--not that I did--but he stood right beneath us for a long time--he seemed a little crabby. From the balcony seats you look down on a swarm of people all building up and tearing down sets and moving giant cameras in the smallest space you can imagine--it's amazing nobody gets hurt. There are tons of people--there are even people whose sole job is to just stand around holding used cue cards.

Annette Bening comes out and starts the show, and it is just surreal--Patrick and I are so overwhelmed by our surroundings that we have trouble really listening and laughing and clapping when prompted--they have all these giant flat screen TVs hanging from the ceilings that have applause signs under them that flash when you are supposed to clap--even the applause signs are Art Deco. When you are in the audience, it is actually hard to see all of the show because they move from set to set, and sometimes cameras block your view, so you need the TV screens to see everything.

Gwen Stefani comes out to perform, and these teenage girls from Jersey that are behind us just go beserk--they were so hilarious with their accents: Ohhh my GGGAAWWWDD, would you just look at hehhhhr--she's so buuootifulll! Gwen, we love you! We'll see you on toouhhr! Oh my Gawd, she looked right at us!" They stood up while Gwen performed and did her whole routine with her, singing and all--they just went nuts. Gwen's exit was right beneath us, and as she leaves the studio the girls literally climb over Patrick and I--we were lucky enough to be in the front row--to hurl themselves over the balcony railing to give Gwen all these really tacky hand-made x-mas gifts they made her. Gwen was really sweet to them--she stopped and talked to them and let them hand down their gifts--if I were her I think I might be afraid to take stuff like that from strangers. While this is happening, I see this man start motioning wildly from the other side of the stage--it's Lorne Michaels trying to get the NBC pages to restrain these girls, but it's way too late--he comes rushing over and stands right beneath me, glaring up at the girls. I think he might have thrown them out, but it was actually the biggest laugh from the audience all night--it was very innocent--they were like kids at Christmas, so the audience just roared. It actually was quite surprising how close to these celebrities you can get--you have to go through a metal detector to get into the show, but anybody can get tickets to these shows, and if they make it in, they can do all kinds of things before there is really anybody close enough to stop them--it's kind of scary.

I was really excited to see the x-mas tree at Rockefeller Center--there are so many amazing holiday decorations in that area, on the storefronts, in the parks, etc., but I have to say that the tree was a let down--it looks okay at night because it has so many lights, but when you see it in daylight, it is a lot of limp, underwatered branches strung together and it looks pretty pathetic--ah well, can't have everything.

It is really amazing and interesting here, but it is also very snooty--everything is about status on the island of Manhattan--there are lines for SNL ticket holders, SNL VIP visitors, SNL stand by tickets, all sorts of levels and sublevels between VIP and "little people," and people here are very conscious of this and very into this game--even at the grocery store this morning, they made us wait until they were ready to unlock the doors, a good 10 minutes after the store was supposed to open. If someone can make you wait or boss you around, they probably will--it's all about power. Even on the SNL set--right after Annette Bening did her opening spiel, the second she was done an SNL staffer came running up and grabbed her by the arm and yanked her off the stage to hair and make-up--I could tell by Annette's face that she didn't appreciate it--it shocked me that someone would treat her like that--this staffer just grabbed her like a rag doll. This place is so much about status
that people will do odd and/or extreme things to feel important--the night security guy at the grocery store can feel like he is somebody because he can make a bunch of people wait in the freezing cold a little longer than they should have to, just cause. It's a crazy world, but fun to observe--very entertaining.

We are looking forward to moving to our apartment--Park Slope is a great neighborhood. We can stay in corporate housing until Feb. 15th--it is a nice high-rise extended stay Marriott, but it is tiny and not very homey, and it is in Chelsea, which is very bitchy--it's all obnoxious modern art galleries, the Martha Stewart Show, the Parsons School (Project Runway)--so basically the streets are full of mean fags and their even meaner fag hags, not any fun gays, and snotty fashion design students--it's fun to look at what they are wearing though--I get a free fashion show every day. It is just simply very clear that we are NOWHERE near cool enough to live in Chelsea, even temporarily, never have been, never will be ... we are living in the middle of as hip as it gets central, and we are polluting the place with our sweat pants, our Bud Light 12-packs, and our mutt dogs.